| | " Until we've faced all the mistakes we've made, we'll never change."
" People don't change, alright? "
" But they CAN. They only don't because its easier not to. "
There are moments in our lives where we find ourselves at crossroads. The choices we make then will define who we are for the rest of our days, of course when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back. But once in awhile, people push on to something better, something found just below the pain, and just beyond the bravery and courage it takes to let someone in, or to give someone a second chance, something beyond the quiet persistence of a dream. Because its only when you're tested that you truly discover who we are, and its only when we're tested, that you discover who you can be. The person you wanna be does exist, somewhere on the otherside of hardwork, faith and belief, and beyond the heartache and fear of what lies ahead.
I hate not being able to be apart of both worlds. I hate not being able to figure out all the solutions to my problems. I hate not being able to talk to my best friend about this.I hate everything about not being able to have the best of both lives.
To make the choice of leaving wms was one of the best and worst decisions in my life. I thought , I thought that when I leave wms, things wouldn't be the same. But it just hit me today that things aren't just not the same. Things are absolutely and extremely different. So I made a decision at a crossroad, which I can't say I regret because I've met the most amazing friends since I've been here. People like Jazmin, Chermayne, Sonia, Belinda, Guankit, Kevin, Wendy, Shaadhoon, Alvin, Bernard. And now, I cant imagine life if without them, and I know life's gotten better with such amazing friends. but then I think about my wesley friends. And how important they were to me as how important my SIS friends are to me now. And I see how we've drifted.
It wasn't supposed to be like this. We weren't supposed to drift. I knew thing's be'd different. I knew it wasn't going to be the same. But i didn't know it meant becoming like this. I DONT WANT US TO DRIFT.
Its funny how one thing that used to be the MOST important to me, is now something I miss and no longer a part of.
It really sucks to know when you're no longer a part of something that used to be so important to you. It sucks to know the friends you've told that you're gonna friends forever with no longer keep in touch with you anymore. It hurts.
And sometimes you just wonder when its going to go away...
Haha, i decided to blog in xanga cause xanga's where all my memories used to be. Probably no one would read this.and maybe thats how I want it. Or maybe, I want someone to read it, someone who'd understand, tell me the truth, someone who'd listen and tell me their honest and sincere opinion, even if its going to hurt like how it does now.
used to...
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| | Posted 6/10/2009 6:05 PM - 86 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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